This Blog
has stopped adding new posts
it is being made into a
movie
For the full blog experience of
Homeless in Iowa
start
with the
enjoy
Monday, October 17, 2011
Sunday, October 2, 2011
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Wanted....
wanted
single women with the world's biggest heart
who is healthy-wealthy and rich beyond belief
and knows THE TRUTH of oneself
and knows THE TRUTH of oneself
and
full of beauty and grace
to change the world over night
and to be the first
homeless in Iowa
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
The Union
I am the god i seek
i sought my soul my beloved embracing me
freely playing with all my brothers and sisters
i am all three
(within the truth, within eternity, within the beloved )
the sacred space off highway one
mother nature smiles, while father sky dances in ecstatic bliss
and
all the beloved archetypes dance and make beautiful love
joining and integrating
the conscious and unconscious path
to
Paradise Utopia
infinite and eternal blessings
dear beloved one
Monday, September 26, 2011
The Rapture
i experienced rapture this morning
my heart was expanding and expanding and expanding with each and every heartbeat
it was like a cosmic sex act within the space of beautiful pure perfect love
it was over whelming
it almost hurt as the
in and out in and out in and out
moment of the feeling
had too much out
and the distance of longing for the beloved was painful within the rapture of it all
I layed down on the bed
searching for something that would transcend the feeling
UNION
appeared
and all was balanced within the rapture of life's orgasmic play
wow.
I finished my book yesterday at
in Iowa City.
is now an official dance, movement, form of listening and moving into the heart of reality
I am ready to take my first partners in
THE DANCE
(the act of making love to the beloved)
healing ALL that needs to be healed
empowering fully, totally and completely oneself
celebrating life to the maximum
every moment of every day
REMEMBER to REMEMBER
the donation button
Let the energy flow!!!
continues
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Ki Maah
Ki Maah
read all eight parts
this opens the doorway to the essence of Ki Maah
is the creator and founder of Ki Maah
an ancient art form that integrates all forms of cultural healing arts
in the creation of the here and now process of playful love with god
in being homeless and returning to the source of home
i remembered to remember
the art that i have mastered long ago which is the source of all my creative play
The Ki Maah Master
the awakened one
invites you to master the dance
will you dance with me?
looking for the wisest and most powerful playmates
to dance the dance
now is the time
meet you tonight in the heart of the cosmic soul
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Why Not ?
Why Not ?
'Why Not ?', is the title of a book that one of my best friends wrote.
Luther Utterbach
The best Iowa artist that I have been blessed to know.
He was THE MASTERPIECE.
Was, as in passed on, dead.
We met later in life when our dreams collided.
I helped him get back his confidence enough to put his last art show together in Des Moines
where he had a huge following of patrons, collectors and great friends.
He had a masterpiece artwork that he was trying to manifest
it was BIG it was HUGE it was MONUMENTAL
a series of 'temples' placed in 'wild or free zones of nature'
Luther grew up in the Iowa countryside, the son of the minister of the little brown church in the vale.
Luther knew religion, he knew the scriptures, he knew god
Luther was in NYC promoting his masterpiece
in the process of getting a major show at the biggest museum
at long last his big break
he needed a break, as living in IOWA being the great artist that he was, meant humiliation, poverty and estranged relationships with his wife and children and friends.
He died in NYC walking across the street with Christo
probably the two greatest artists in the world....
Luther was the unknown American Artist, Christo the world famous Bulgarian born artist living successfully in NYC.
I knew Christo and his partner wife Jean Claude while working at the Lajolla Museum of Contemporary Art
they spent months at the museum putting together his first ever retrospective.
Luther was Amazing
I have photos and videos of Luther during his last years
The book, "Why Not?" was a very very limited edition printed for his last show
I am offering "Why Not?" up for sale to the art community for the benefit of making his geniusness known
to Iowans and to the world, part of The Iowa Idea.
"Why Not?" is for sale for $300,000.00
with proceeds going to jump start the Makiah O Miller Foundation.
and the
Peace City II
project of co-creating a state of the art homeless city in
Iowa City, Iowa
I think Luther is probably living in Bhutan now
their way of living is very much Luther's ideals.
I hope to make them the ideals of
Peace City II
remember to remember
being AUTHENTIC to oneself leads to the deepest truths of the heart
the place where
Paradise Utopia
always exists
and always remember to remember the donation button
going from nothing $$$ ....to something $$$ is a HUGE step.
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Dr Helms and Friends
Friends
I went to take my North Face tent, my home, down yesterday. It was in the front yard sheltered and shaded by the two large pine trees at the First Street Community Center.
Inside the tent was a box of food; a round loaf of bread, some chicken and appetizers and a pecan pie.
John Wellso had created a 'spontaneous act of love' for me. A delicious meal. A heart felt gesture
telling me "I CARE" ....when your homeless, you feel alone...really alone. You feel worthless. You feel like an outcast. You feel discarded and trashed. You feel like life isn't your friend.
John Wellso brings me back to reality. Friends are all that ever really matter in life.
Friends that reach out to hug to care to love. Friends that give and share the abundance of their life.
Friends who know the act of 'spontaneous acts of love.'
In BEING homeless....the most important first step in finding oneself is to
you need a quiet warm comfortable safe place to practice the art of listening
a meditation space or room or house or chapel or tent
that sacred space of listening to the divine within
I am so blessed, I have Allie Chapel, on the Cornell College campus, my true home in Mount Vernon
the place where inspiration from within speaks clearly to my intention of creating paradise utopia
ideas appear and ideas flow
Dr Helms and Friends
is what comes after the meditation center
that special place where FRIENDS gather to share ideas
and
spontaneous acts of love
a warm comfortable homey place
a place of pure luxury
a place to shower and soak and get squeaky clean and refreshed
a place to be touched and messaged and loved to the center of your being
a place to be inspired by all the 33 points of light inspirational friends.
a place to read and learn and share knowledge and wisdom
a place to dance and celebrate life to the fullest
Dr Helms and Friends
is ONE of the first steps in creating a solution for homelessness after
meditation
own almost a million homes across this fine nation
where is the first empty house needing to be transformed into
Dr Helms and Friends
home of creative rejuvenation
My cup runith over of amazing masterpeace ideas
without friends helping friends
NOTHING sprouts, nothing blooms, nothing bares fruit
I am looking for friends to join
Dr Helms and friends
in creating something that begins
An American Renaissance Town
Remember
the DONATION BUTTON above
and
Remember to Remember
The Donation Button Makes Things Happen.
What do you want to make happen?
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
The Plan
Intention - Idea - Vision
Reality Check...time to focus...time for action
What are my assets?
A good strong healthy body and a great attitude. A life time of art. Ideas galore. A vision of healthy happy people playing and working together to co-create the most fun loving communities.
The Idea
Everything I own goes to my son Makiah Orion Miller...that translates to a lot of artwork and ideas to sustain a world of healthy happy people to make sure he is always surrounded by people who love and cherish him and appreciate the genius that he is.
So, I visited the Greater Cedar Rapids Community Foundation to discuss the possibility of getting money to start the Makiah O Miller Foundation. A very pleasant discussion with Karla Twedt-Ball lead me down that long lonesome bureaucratic road to very little money in the sometime distant future. My needs are IMMEDIATE!
So immediate that having you click on the DONATION BUTTON on the upper right corner of this page would probably be the best solution to getting the Makiah O Miller Foundation up and rolling.
To begin the process of grant approval...the IRS non profit forms need to be filled out immediately.
Volunteers Welcomed.
The Vision
To create an organization with a mission of creating healthy and happy people co-creating healthy and happy communities. With the soul intention of providing a place that supports the ultimate health of oneself.
I would like to rival the Susan G Komen Foundation as an inspiration to health and well being.
Remember the Donation Button
On the homeless Iowa poverty front lines today.....my friend The Ultimate Binge Drinker decided buying a new Chevy $45,000.00 truck before getting his drivers license might not be a good idea.
Looking into local resources for the homeless, more on that tomorrow.
Ninety percent of my nutrition source comes from Body by Vi .....joining this great organization would sure give me hope for my continued nutritional well being.
Its NEVER about THE MONEY.
"Warning of the possibility of a depression, Harkin Sept. 15 called for a job creation package bigger than Obama’s $447 billion proposal to jump start economic activity."
Okay...let's say I have nothing....no money, no savings, no house, no credit, no job....nothing....BUT the assets that I AM.
WE are all born individual unique miraculous beautiful creative geniuses...REMEMBER.....THE TRUTH. Everything in life is about RELATIONSHIPS.....understanding the TRUTH of our connection and relationship with THE CREATOR....defines all our other relationships. From that primary relationship we begin to co-create our perspective or VISION to who we are. That PLAY between BEST FRIENDS sets THE GAME in motion.
Give me a hundred dollars, give me a thousand dollars, give me a million dollars, give me seven billion dollars, give me hundreds of trillions of dollars. Without the total FREEDOM to play with THE CREATOR in discovering and experiencing ONESELF.... Money just keeps the SYSTEM continuing down the path of misery, slavery and desperate actions of attempting to fulfill an empty vessel.
When DEPRESSED the ONLY cure is to connect with THE CREATOR ....the source of all abundance. Especially through the knowledge and wisdom of LOVE and its VITAL importance to life.
So, Tom.......give me ONE PERCENT of that total package to EDUCATE the nation on how to get out of being DEPRESSED and get into a relationship with THE CREATOR that CHANGES and TRANSFORMS ....EVERYTHING.
So Tom.....just shine the LIGHT on Iowa's Face of Poverty.....and watch the nation start to shift in being more healthy and happy and content with creating from THE SOURCE.............. The New America Renaissance.....Mount Vernon Iowa with the assistance of the Makiah O Miller foundation and the wisdom of it's amazing ELDERS....MainStreet Mount Vernon Iowa USA is creating and designing a SYSTEM based on putting the individual unique miraculous beautiful creative genius of THE CHILDREN in a top priority position of our new nation. Networking the geniusness of the children with the geniusness of the ELDERS and the geniusness of everyone else TOGETHER....vibrant new vital systems of creative well being will sprout to form the most dynamic family and community structures of sustainability.
Great Nutrition...Great Exercise...with the most AMAZINGLY Healthy ATTITUDE....is the real solution. All three aspects combined with those THREE aspects that are most ESSENTIAL to life.....Consciousness, the Original ONE Cell and the HEART beat.....all three combining to AWAKEN the nation.....can life be more simple or easy or fulfilling or FREE or healthy or happy or PERFECT.....with the ultimate VISION of your own Paradise Utopia ...each step in the JOURNEY is another step in HEAVEN.
This morning I was Blessed to connect with a meditation with THE BELOVED concerning FORGIVENESS and LOVE, an ACTIVE FEELING meditation of forgiving all the abuse, dysfunction, stupid pathetic habitual bad game playing, with the REAL REALITY of beautiful pure perfect love that ALWAYS IS ....ALWAYS HAS BEEN...and ...ALWAYS WILL BE.....EVERYTHING IN THE MATERIAL WORLD, and all worlds are created from THE THREE....nutrition-exercise-attitude....consciousness-Original ONE Cell- Heart Beat....height-width-depth....to AWAKEN AMERICA to The New American Renaissance.....throw ALL the 447 billion dollars into the FIRE of this passionate heart.....the TRUE face of poverty in IOWA....is this heaven, no it's Iowa ?
ps. Caroline just stopped by upset that she heard THEY are now lacing marijuana with meth in order to get the children addicted......I reminded her that the greatest HIGH is BEING oneself....and the art of listening or MEDITATION is the pathway 'drug' to that blissful state of being. pelodom
Monday, September 19, 2011
The Freedom to Play
Life is about FREEDOM....Freedom to play to one's hearts' content....passionately, wholeheartedly, engagingly....always using every part of one's geniusness to play for the perfect prize...for the perfect life...for the ultimate dream, for the most ideal love, for the grandest experience of pleasure....I have found it amazing what games WE all play that make this world go round and round and round.....
Not only the wild wacky games boys play to collect yet another toy to play with... whether a new car, new boat, new mistress, new sports event, new country to conquer, or new experience to cherish.....and yes girls and their games can be very complex and intriguing, full of twists and turns and chaotic plots of mastering the perfect relationship for the ultimate excitement of pure pleasure or pure safety or pure need to be loved.
Game Framers by Aaron Dignan opens the mind to the ultimate games people can create to play all encompassing healthy wealthy truth seeking reality based games. It is all a huge step up from the old 1964 classic Eric Berne masterpiece, " Games People Play. " The big step is in FREEDOM to CREATE your own game. For me, The Ultimate Invitation goes out to you......
Just a note on my own game and game playing. I grew up innocent and naive in a pretty perfect community where everyone loved and cared for one another and we could even survive perfectly well from eating our landscaped neighborhood of the delicious fruit from the apple, plum, cherry trees...rhubarb was bountiful. Life was perfect. I grew up with little to few desires or wishes as I had everything ....especially that one thing that made me feel so complete and whole.....the amazingly perfect love of my mom and dad and sister. The foundation of wealth is really based on the WHOLENESS of self love....the more you get to experience as a child the more health and happiness and dancing you will be able to do as an adult. Self love is the game changer....it changes all the dysfunctional abuse and bad habits ....into empowering oneself to master the art of being a game designer. We have come a long way baby!
In mastering my own game of creating and designing systems of utopia I need not go much further than TOUCH....our skin is our greatest sensing cellular organ....HUGE....in America, probably in the world...WE live in a culture that shuns touching....touching is probably the greatest physical pleasure know to oneself. Can you imagine a life without FEELING.....a life without being TOUCHED......as a man, some parts of the body bring more pleasure than others, as a man I can only be envious and jealous and AMAZED at that most amazing pleasure organ that women have that WE men have NOT A CLUE about .....the life of Clitoris.....
As well, maybe WE men have NOT A CLUE about pleasure and the real games that need to be created for the ultimate health and wealth of the world.
Maybe "boy toys" are the ultimate life has to offer.....infinite and eternal blessings to creating your most perfect game!
Sunday, September 18, 2011
A heavenly suicide into Paradise Utopia
A full day of tailgating at the front door to Kinnick Stadium watching the Iowa Hawkeyes come from the largest come from behind victory in their history.
My sister and husband had gone to the game leaving Makiah and I in charge of the big screen tv and the small gathering of people watching the game on the side of their brand new Winnebago View motor home.
Makiah would rather be ON the field Playing than watching....so during most the game we played catch in the parking lot. It ended up everyone wanted to play with him as they thought he was amazing. With some coaching from an expert his throwing improved to WOW level. He felt good about being the new Ricky Stanzi on campus.
After the game we walked about three or four miles to pick up my car....he did a great job with the walk. Then drove to Marion to deliver him to his brother Nick, for a night of playing and bonding.
I returned to Mount Vernon to take a shower and prepare myself for the night. The World's Most Amazing Mom was HOME and we had a dialogue. She felt that I really needed sleep. She thought I looked distraught. She offered some sleeping pills and I settled for a short back message. She left. I rested for a couple minutes. Then got up full of energy and took a shower and prepared myself for another night of 'whatever' meditation. I headed over to Allie Chapel on the Cornell College Campus. I put down my pendleton blanket, lite a candle and started to listen to the silence. Quickly, I was told to give up life and death. I was feeling complete about life. I had everything and MORE, everything and TOO MUCH. I began RELEASING everything about life and death. I started to get antsy. I couldn't sit...I started wanting to commit suicide. I starting crying hysterically. I didn't have any real desire to live anymore. I didn't want to live life without MY BELOVED. I meditated between my crying attacks on any addictions or sickness attached to my relationships. Nothing. I was cleared to proceed with my ultimate vision of suicide. Paradise Utopia.
Makiah was born at HOME. I delivered him from his wildly screaming MOM early morning June 22 1999 after a wonderful evening drumming meditation at Palisades Park outside Mount Vernon. First responders and the ambulance arrived in time to hurry the three of us to Mercy Hospital in Iowa City. Where baby Makiah was rushed to University Hospitals while exhausted MOM was told..."your discharged NOW"
We followed shortly to find our new child in intensive care unit full of wires and tubes. MOM checked herself into the hospital for a couple days of needed rest. Because of acute aortic stenosis a heart operation followed.....and since that first day he returned HOME, he slept between MOM and DAD...not just for a month or two til he could sleep in his crib but years and years followed of Makiah sleeping between US...til the last years when Tia, MOM's ugly untrained boxer took my place in the bed and I slept alone upstairs.
For some reason I had been imprinted with my Paradise Utopia vision of the THREE of us cuddled together in the warm love of that blissful FAMILY bond. We were BLESSED. Despite ALL the dysfunction. I just wanted to escape from being homeless and return to that perfect blissful way of being a FAMILY unit...hugging my two BELOVED LOVES....and falling peacefully to my death full sleep. I cried and sobbed as I felt the experience unfolding. I knew that if I could meditate complete WAKEFULNESS by a simple desire, that the act of 'disconnecting' or death would be so simple. I was anxious to go HOME. I put on my sweat shirt and jacket and started walking quickly home to my eternal sleep.
I drew a simple line drawing titled, Paradise Utopia ....and three simple line drawings of MOM...MAKIAH...DAD. Then got into my lovely large soft warm bed and said "GOOD-BYE" to this world and everyTHING in it.
..................................................................... I WOKE UP! AGAIN!!! After a couple of hours of sleep, the first sleep in nine days..... I was wide awake, and completely dumbfounded.
The Beloved
My transition of being homeless lead me to Iowa City.
I hung out with a friend, sharing the meditation techniques of The Awakened One. The Awakened One is a wooden sculpture that was given to me by a friend several decades ago. The statue is from the Sung Dynasty in China. My friend Liesel grow up in china as her dad was employed by Standard Oil back in the early 1920's. The Awakened One is my favorite piece of art.
I have decided to sell the artwork to support my work of spreading the message of ENLIGHTENMENT and the New American Renaissance. I hope to engage China, India and America in purchasing The Awakened One in order to create, design and finance a new program of cultural exchange. I am hoping Aung Sun Suu Kyi of Burma will facilitate the sale.
I started my meditation on the ped mall late...in time to see the students rush out of the bars and bustle home in the chilled air. I was engaged in a conversation by a young bright philosophy student. She was dragging an adult boy toy with her, he stood nearby speechless as Mother Mary talked about her four year old daughter and about having just come from having sex on the nearby bank rooftop, apparently one of her new found pleasures in life. She wanted my pendleton blanket. She was bright and inquisitive, wanting to know everything I knew about life .....she wanted MORE but really couldn't define what that might mean....she grabed her man-boy toy and walked into the night.
I decided to head over to my favorite place in town. The meditation room at University Hospitals. It was the year anniversary of Makiah's heart surgery. A traumatic time of replacing both his heart valves by Dr. Tom Davis. Everything has seemed to be perfect. This last year has brought amazing new maturity and growth and happiness to ALL of us. I spent about six hours in GRATITUDE.
And came away with visions of THE BELOVED, and knowing our hearts were ONE and the same.
How silly I seem to myself, the most simple profound TRUTHS sometimes seem so hidden in the muck.
goodnight John Boy.
goodnight Clitoris.
Friday, September 16, 2011
The Naked Truth....appeared on the bottle of one of my favorite beverages, Naked Juice. I awoke this morning in The USA Enterprise ll asking what is the naked truth.......
"WE are all born individual unique miraculous beautiful creative geniuses." the basic foundation of naked truth. Without this as the foundation of truth, life can just get messy confusing and downright pain full at times.
I picked Makiah up at school to enjoy one of my all time favorite activities in life, 'walking Makiah home from school' .....we talked about plans for the evening and decided a trip to Ames to see mom and grandma, The World's Greatest Mom, would be just perfect.
There was a small problem, because of lack of money my car had been sitting in the driveway for the past month and a half, no car insurance. My old high school buddy and now The Worlds Biggest Binge Drinker had called a couple days earlier and asked if I would be his chauffeur, because he didn't have anyone else to drive him around to get his basic groceries, which lately consisted of a short ride in the direction of the grocery store then with the words " I feel really sick would you take me back home." .....anyway, I hurriedly called my insurance company and literally good neighbor to see how much it would be. Interestingly enough because my good driver policy had elapsed, I was now on high risk rate. My old policy was 320 dollars for full coverage...NOW it was 560 dollars for just the basic liability. Nothing like being in GOOD HANDS. I called my buddies Power of Attorney to ask for the insurance money to pay to be a chauffeur...I decided to ask for just one month as I was contemplating my options...like hiring a limo anytime I wanted to go somewhere and probably save money. We were off to see MOM.
I hadn't been able to see much of Makiah since I was asked to leave the house and a lot of 'changes' had taken place so I was excited to spend time with connecting to see how he was really doing...we had a great two hour drive....we laughed a lot, mostly about sneaky cops eating donuts. We stopped at the casino to visit the gift store to see if my favorite pendleton blanket was still there. It was. A Sioux Eastern Star blanket that reminded me of one of my mentors Black ElkWallace . Sometime I will wear that blanket in honor of Wallace. When the money flows.
Seeing mom was heavenly. Decided just sitting in THE PRESENCE of my ninety one year mom is the greatest gift of all.....she was SO HAPPY to see and be with Makiah and me. We were having a great time when the phone rang and it was our other AMAZING mom. The conversation was great and 'I love you's " exchanged, but immediately after Makiah said good-bye he got sick, felt like an upset stomach and throwing up.....we went out doors for some fresh air ....he really wanted to sleep in our traveling home. I was really really comfortable. He slept late. While I felt integrated and energized by being next to him all night .....still no sleep for me.
Okay, let's take a look at the sleep issue. If consciousness is THE SOURCE of energy or our life force and is connected to ALL living things everywhere in all the universes...WE KNOW consciousness never sleeps......and .....since that most miraculous wondrous moment when the sperm cell and egg cell INTEGRATED into that individual unique miraculous beautiful creative genius WE.....and then divided into the 100 trillion cells making up the body....THE ONE CELL never never sleeps........and since the first beat of the heart within the embryo....WE KNOW the heart never sleeps .....so .....sleep isn't at all necessary as long as ONE is well INTEGRATED and CONSCIOUSLY connected......no sleep has it's benefits and BEING TOTALLY AWAKENED still means allowing for dream time if DESIRED.
The Awakened One
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Where the butterfly lands
Sometimes the most innocent beautiful free loving 'butterfly' can create such AMAZING chaotic conflict and pain inducing insanity.....
Knowing the TRUTH of oneself can fulfill the body with such amazing SELF LOVE that miracles are the every moment dance of life. And the FLOWER of LIFE can then transform the world.
Meditation is the ART of LISTENING....sensing in all aspects the form and function and movement of consciousness...the blood of all life.
Today, seeing clearly the issues that FREEDOM bring to society and our culture our communities our families and our own empowerment....leave me with a sense of embracing THE TRUTH of the SELF.
The USA Enterprise is driving across America with the INTENTION of restoring the Art of Greatness to this nation. In reality it all gets down to a very personal level of engagement with oneself.
How much can I love thee.
Until the personal connection to THE SOURCE is made there is no grounding to the source of truth. Without grounding to the source....games of painful conflicting chaos is the order of the day.
So....from the USA Central Command Center to Randy driving The USA Enterprise across America to the heartland these are the 'orders' of the day.
Connect the ONES....kinda like connecting the dots to GET THE PICTURE.
WE ARE ALL ONE. Consciousness is the life force that connects US ALL. Everywhere in Everything. The flow, the energy, the form, the love, the essence of THE NETWORK. Know CONSCIOSNESS.
BE and Know the original ONE cell that was created out of the TWO. Be oneself is the ultimate goal of education. By focusing THE ONE consciousness into THE ONE original cell....the hardware is plugged in.
Then by connecting THE ONE with THE ONE with THE ONE HEART ...the human biocomputer is PROGRAMMED. Once the three ONE dots of life are connected, get out of the way as Paradise Utopia is being co-created and co-designed NATURALLY.....because EVERYTHING is connected into THE PROGRAM or GAME of how healthy and happy can WE possibly BE.
Can you imagine a world of the most beautiful abundant wealth giving butterflies flying freely everywhere. ENLIGHTENING everything that they come in contact with.....here comes the USA Enterprise, restoring the ART of Greatness to our nation.
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
First "real" night of being homeless in Iowa.
Also, after working as artist in residence at Sol y Sombre the home of Charles and Beth Miller in Santa Fe New Mexico and Georgia O'keefee's last residence....the only other comparable position was to be 'artist in residence for planet Earth' so in full filling that position I feel that EVERY WHERE on the planet is MY HOME....so saying that I AM homeless in Iowa ....seems somewhat of a lie.
I left 'the family' behind and took off on my 'meditation about' the Mount Vernon homeless adventure. Several layers of clothes with a native pendleton black and brown designed 'gathering' blanket for real warmth.
The large hillside Mount Vernon Cemetery was close. The almost full moon and clear sky were a perfect backdrop for my first several hour meditation. I sat behind a large grave stone so no one would notice my presence. Seems so miraculous that so soon after a dramatic dialogue that I could be feeling so good again. Clearness of the sky matched my empty thoughts and emotions. Just Being ALIVE among the dead felt pretty soothing.
My meditation focused on being in the heart space, beautiful pure perfect love, I like to say. I had stayed within that space of ' We are all One' from the Bass Farm mediation combined with the original zygote being ONE cell to the now added third ONE heart meditation. The ONE love we all seem to share. It was a beautiful night, perfect.
When the time came to move...I moved. All wrapped up in my native wool warm blanket, I sat at the out door comfortable table and chairs of the First Street Community Center. I love Rick and Trude Elliott, the owners and creators of the MainStreet Community Center. Building community from the inside out is one of the most difficult arts of our time. I have been blessed to have lived in some amazing communities that are always in the process of attempting to improve on their art of community building. Marion Iowa my hometown. Carefree Arizona, Naples Florida, Lajolla California, Peace City, Aspen Colorado, Taos New Mexico and Beth Miller's Sol y Sombra in Santa Fe, and now Mount Vernon Iowa ...home of Cornell College my alma matter.
Edgar Helms is my favorite Cornell Alumni. He created Goodwill Industries in Boston in 1902. He was amazing, more on him later. His inspiration along another mile of my journey brings inspirational light to my path, always.
I was ready to move westward to the old Lincoln highway bridge crossing the double railroad tracks. A favorite pastime, decades ago, to be on the tiny wooden bridge while huge freight trains would pass inches below you. I got to experience two trains at once last night....a 'remember me' kind of experience. Then I walked over to the park on the entrance to town, I had never been there before and it was beginning to get cold and damp. I layered on the picnic table by the nearby fire pit. A fire would have been wonderful. I wasn't really prepared except for a bottle of water that I brought along. Several hours later...I got cold and decided to find a warm spot in town. Olin Hall was nearby, the dorm that I spent three years in while at Cornell. I found a first floor study type room that was warm with nice furniture and the most quiet space I have experienced in Mount Vernon. My meditation went on for several hours before I felt the pulse of early morning movement about town. I walked through town, people were starting to move about the dark town. I even encountered a group of four joggers and cars parked at the community center fitness center.
I went back to my old white home on hilltop drive and quietly made my way into 'my' second floor bed. It felt good. I lay awake meditating on my experiences and all I had learned about THE SELF, loving the self and the layers and layers of complex systems of symbolic characters screaming out or hiding away within the ideal self awaiting to be 'discovered.' or just re known .......I went straight into a short dream and was awakened quickly as it played out. Clear as ever was the transition into the morning hour.
It is amazing that we ever communicate with one another as the real communication takes place within the mufti-dimensional layers of unknown and known senses of being oneself. While the external superficial material layers of skin providing such a beautiful representation of the wholeness never seems touched nearly enough.
Life is so beautiful in its myriad diversity. Time to contemplate another night of meditation about town.
The Relationship with Oneself
All life is about relationships. And the most important relationship of all is with oneself. Master oneself and the world is yours, THEY say. So this is kinda where this blog takes a divergent kind of twist. How to tell the TRUTH and how to keep the story positive and upbeat and educational for EVERYONE involved.
So, I will use my lessons learned as examples....hopefully several other spin off books or films or projects will spin off from this blog. I think we ALL have our own individual unique miraculous creative perspectives on the truth...and ...I believe consciousness and other natural systems or mediums do contain some aspects of THE TRUTH...which makes life somewhat manageable in co-creating and co-designing systems of utopia.
The Self is made up of many internal perspectives and layers of perspectives. Complex we ALL be. How we SEE ourselves, feel and know oneself ....how we complete the integral 'perfect portraiture' of ourselves within our natural rasa, or essential nature is the foundation of how we love oneself.... loving oneself is what defines EVERY RELATIONSHIP you will ever experience. If the foundation of THE PERSPECTIVE of oneself isn't full, total and complete....neither will the richness of your relations. Empty holes or aspects of your 'perfect portraiture' will assist you always in forming relationships filled with pain and abuse. Learning how to LOVE oneself and being free to express oneself is the basics of life time health and happiness. Simple and easy as that.
So I'll leave out the MAJOR INSPIRATIONAL CHARACTERS of this blog for another day. Let it be accounted they are very normal people learning to learn how to master the art of life so to best full fill their Dream BIG Dreams. They are AMAZING life partners...full of beauty and grace and geniusness AND the most CHALLENGING relationships of my life. Enough said for now.
Back to SELF.....left brain right brain intelligence. Emotional, spatial and intuitive integrated. Beta, alpha, theta, delta brain waves balanced ...peace ....charka flow of energy with heart based centered communication systems. Balance balance balance.....balancing the conscious and unconscious mind with awareness of all the positive negative archetypal characters directing your games of play. Seems like there is always a new internal system to balance. Makiah taught me the simple "happy hands, happy feet, happy heart...happyplanetindex.org" dance to bring oneself into simple and easy balance with the planet, oneself and the universe. There are very simple profound ways to maintain that ONE magical relationship with the creator....but I have never found them too easy to find.
My birthday was day four of my homeless meditation and it was almost perfect in my eyes and heart. The best birthday probably ever. With Joe Jennison hosting a large community volunteer dinner party in the towns park....it was classic beautiful MainStreet Mount Vernon USA event. Makiah and I had a good time. The large crowd sang happy birthday to me and a cake and candles were wished upon and devoured.
Diving into the depths of dysfunction followed. Remembering to remember, remembering to know, remembering to learn, remembering THE LOVE, remembering the journey, remembering THE DANCE, remembering enough that all pathways of the future were known.
I began to be concerned about not sleeping...very little eating with NO appetite, I really enjoyed. I met with Rev Catherine, the expert on all things meditation and she didn't seem to be of concern and I certainly was feeling NO areas of concern with my body....balanced, calm, yet energized, peaceful, alert, all systems humming radiating and acting like I would never again need to sleep. Kinda weird I thought because I always was one to love sleeping and dreaming.
More issues exposed. More pain. More insights. And on to the my first night of homelessness.
Meditation at the Iowa Meditation Center
The golden yellow North Face tent was put up and I crawled in with my purple sleeping bag and continued the homeless meditation. I think I began mastering the art of meditation in The World's Greatest Mom's womb and loved to go sit in small dark closets as a child. I always loved the silence and darkness, as there I always could find perfect peace with an ability to develop my imagination and intuition at will. Later in life, I walked across America with The Great Peace March with an intention to learn all I could about PEACE...so I set out across America with my focused attention on mastering prayer-contemplation-meditation. Twenty-five years later I still love learning all I can concerning connecting and networking the software for the worlds most amazing human bio-computer.
Meditation for me, is playing with the central control center of focusing the attention of consciousness...that god energy that is the source and power of all life.
So, I begin the process of focusing on the breath, the heart beat...then everywhere and anywhere throughout the body and then to the sounds outside my little golden dome tent. I was feeling really really good. Relaxed. Refreshed. I started asking questions in order to practice the ART of LISTENING, probably the greatest art of all the arts. I wanted to understand my condition of the why's of being HOMELESS IN IOWA and how could I possibly have gotten here. ( Although I love The Iowa Meditation Center that Chris Bass was sharing with me.)
Questions mostly on relationship issues. The answers started appearing quickly. I decided to ask "What is the Greatest Truth of ALL" ..... " WE ARE ALL ONE " was heard very clearly. I started to remember my conversations with Cliff Brown that I had days earlier while helping him move. I was AMAZED at the stories of 84 year old Cliff's journey through servicing, knowing, programming, teaching and managing everything in Iowa during the earliest days of computers. He said the wave of technological advancement NOW was in the area of cellular technology.
My brain neurons began to collect all the information that i had collected over the 59 years of my awareness concerning cells, biology, computers, programming, consciousness, psychology, spirituality, relationship theory, engineering and health and well being.
Every Thing seems to begin with Inspiration and then Intention. My inspiration was being kicked into a new unknown universe and how could I master the art of it as quickly as possible...kinda like designing a new game....being totally FREE and being totally in the play of designing a system that would make me happy happy happy.
My Intention was who to connect the hardware of the world's most miraculous computer with the creative genius software that god had provided for us. My intention began more a vision of seeing my body fully completely totally connected to the state of the art software available. I began to see the connection. Consciousness, that source or life energy that connects everything in the universe...kinda like 'god's body.' the we are all one kinda of experience. Then I remembered that most magical time of life when WE were all ONE, when the sperm combines with the egg to integrate the most miraculous individual unique wondrous beautiful creative genius in the universe. The zygote. Oneness connecting with Oneness. So I very simply and easily connected the cosmic circuit. Consciousness to One Original Cell......WOW....something began to happen....I was connected for the first time....every cell in my body began to start to move and dance and warm up and radiate....I started asking questions...answers came immediately...I played with asking questions from different chakra centers and received appropriate answers. WOW WOW WOW. For three days I played with the new self human bio computer and got to experience so many wonderful visions and answers and ways and means of perfecting the system.
I was happy. I was having fun. I would extent my meditations to walking meditations at nearby Palisades Park where they also had a nice bathroom that I used to feel fresh and clean and new.
I asked what was the greatest IDEA in the world ....and received an answer that immediately started me laughing. So I began practicing THE SECRET...a simple easy meditation technique. And hilarious happiness began to brake out. EVERYTHING was at my command. Answers abounded.
I owned the world.
From being homeless and clueless to within three days feeling so happy, balanced, complete, connected, EMPOWERED to know that yes, I owned the world. It was hilarious.
I wanted to see Makiah my magical man of a twelve year old son who I had not said good-bye too when I set out on the three day meditation....I packed up my tent and sleeping bag and headed out through fields of corn and soybeans, gravel roads and the old dirt road path leading straight into MainStreet Mount Vernon Iowa USA and into the while house on hilltop drive that three days earlier was my home.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)